Trauma

What can you do about child trafficking? From a child trafficking survivor

Me singing at the base of the Cristo statue with a bunch of other cult kids, in Rio de Janeiro where I grew up.

Me at 12 years old in The Children of God cult, singing at the base of the Cristo statue with a bunch of other cult kids in Rio de Janeiro where I grew up.

In my TikTok account, I talk all about my memories of growing up in The Children of God Cult. I talk about how I was labor trafficked (like in the photo above), the insane cult practices, and my experiences growing up in the leadership inner circle as a child celebrity, known in the cult as Mary Dear.

Because of my outspoken views on cults, child trafficking, sexuality, men, women’s rights and more, many people have come to me with their concerns and well wishes, telling me that the recent reports in the news with more Epstein file leaks, more stories of child abuse and trafficking, have been deeply distressing to them.

I thank all of those who have checked in on me during this time to ask how I am I doing mentally, because many people are struggling right now and feeling overwhelmed with all this news. Many are just now coming to terms that their favorite celebrity or politician, may be, in fact, a child abuser.

And while yes, it’s understandable for people to feel overwhelmed, angry, and disheartened about the recent developments, the short answer for me is, I’m doing just fine.

Why?

Well, one, because I’ve been working on healing my trauma and mental health since 2018. I’ve done more work on myself than 99% of the people I know. I know the ins and outs of trauma, of psychological warfare, manipulation, gaslighting, trafficking, cults, mind control, and more.

I consider myself fully healed in that yes, while I know healing is not linear where you reach a pinnacle of nirvana, I now have all the tools necessary to regulate my emotions and take care of myself when I am triggered or in a bad spot, in order to not perpetuate my trauma onto others.

And two, nothing in the news bothers me because, well, I don’t watch it. I have a very strict rule of what type of content I consume, and I don’t watch or read things that are meant to make my emotions run high to where I’m not thinking out of logic and reasoning, but on emotions.

Many people have this belief (exasperated by Social media) that it’s honorable and the right thing to do to get mad at everything going on in the world, to scream and yell about it on social media from the comfort of your house, to be mad at the “system” “the patriarchy” “the government”, etc. but not taking further action.

While yes, there is a time and a place for online activism, usually social media activism falls short cause what good are you doing in your life (except elevate your cortisol levels) and your community to constantly to get upset at the next trending tragedy, the next war, the next terrible event that the media shoves on us.

If you’ve ever studied Journalism (like I did in my 6 year college journey when I escaped the cult and proceeded to change my major 4 times), you will know that trauma sells. If the news was reporting majorly positive stories, less people would watch, which means less sponsors, which means less ads, which means less money.

Trauma sells. Disaster sells. That’s why we go through phases of marching around because of this terrible thing in the news, or sharing a bunch of terrible videos of things going on in other countries, and then, suddenly…poof. It’s like it never happened. Why? Because we need a new trauma to get addicted to, so the media just pushes the next one out for us (Remember KONY2012?)

In the past years I can name them all: Remember when people put flags on their profile for Ukraine? Then we were made about immigration. Now it’s Palestine, and we’re moving into Sudan…FYI, the war in Ukraine is still happening. Gaza, still happening. What isn’t happening is seeing a bunch of Ukraine flags everywhere. And less and less Palestine. But you best believe me we’ll start seeing Sudan soon.

Which leads me to my next and final point.

If you are feeling angry, overwhelmed, constantly mad at the big bad system that’s out to get you, put it all away. Turn it off, and unfollow.

Then, go volunteer in your own community. There are starving kids right down the street from you. There are kids who have immigrated here to escape wars, children who have lost parents and family members in horrific ways. There are kids who are recovering from car crashes, fires, abuse and more IN YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD .

You want to make a difference? It’s not sharing videos online and arguing with strangers on the internet.

Go volunteer at a hospital, orphanage, a burn unit, mental health facility, immigration center, and more. Go make a difference in your own community first. Then watch your life and mental health change, because now you are funneling that anger into something productive that is actually helping people.

This is the simple answers.

Things will ALWAYS be happening in the world, and you can’t do anything about it, and you don’t have control over it. What you do have control over, is how you react to these events, and what you do about it going forward.

Online activism is not activism. It’s trauma addiction. Many people who are out there sharing videos are sitting on their couch, not doing anything about it. I say this as a kid who grew up in a cult, yes, but the one thing we did do in the cult, was be of service to others.

I grew up going to orphanages, hospitals, retirement homes and favelas (def had no business being there, but I digress), to provide food, clothing, songs, and more to those less fortunate than me. This instilled in me a knowledge and desire to always be service in my community, so in my adult life, I volunteered all over Texas at women’s shelters and equine mental health facilities.

So yes my friends, it’s really as simple as that. Turn off the news, get out of your house, and go be of service to others.

Stop getting angry for no reason, shouting at strangers on the internet and making your life worse. Go out there do something about it.

That’s real change and activism.

Get out in the great outdoors

In this fast-paced world, we often forget the incredible healing powers nature offers. We’re forget to connect and recharge by immersing ourselves in the tranquil embrace of the great outdoors. 🌞💚

Research has shown that spending time in nature reduces stress, improves mental well-being, and increases creativity. 📚💡 It’s always great to take a break from screens and urban chaos to embark on an adventure with nature as your teacher.

Today, take a moment to disconnect from the chaos, plug into nature, and listen to what it has to tell you. When you spend time with the healing powers of nature, your soul and spirit will heal.

Or…you may realize that you never needed healing in the first place. You just needed to leave your bubble, get outside, and reconnect with what’s most important…yourself and you spirit.

Horses are some of nature's greatest healers

There’s something truly enchanting about horses, something that transcends mere words and touches the deepest corners of our souls. They possess a unique kind of magic that fills our hearts with wonder and awe.

🐎 Horses are more than just graceful animals; they are empathetic beings, capable of forging a connection that goes beyond human understanding. Whenever I find myself in their presence, an indescribable sense of peace washes over me. They are the call to any storm.

Throughout history, horses have been revered as symbols of strength, freedom, and spiritual connection. Their presence exudes a kind of ethereal beauty that effortlessly captivates anyone lucky enough to witness it. They are the embodiment of grace, power, and resilience, teaching us valuable lessons about life and ourselves along the way.

Beyond their physical allure, horses possess an incredible ability to heal. Their nonjudgmental nature and unwavering acceptance create a safe space where we can truly be ourselves. When you’re around them time slows down, worries fade away and you find solace and serenity from the chaos of everyday life. This is why I chose to volunteer at an equine mental health facility and pursuit certifications in equine mental health facilitation.

My love for horses runs deep, all the way from childhood in Brazil. They were an escape from me during extremely hard times and will forever hold a special place in my heart. They taught me patience, perseverance, and the importance of trust. Through them I’ve learned to embrace vulnerability, listen with my heart, and communicate beyond words. Horses are not only companions but soulmates, connecting with me on a level that words alone cannot express.

This horse is Bella and she lives in . I spent every day with her for hours when visited her ranch, in her presence during my cross country trip. Her demeanor and love for connection was unparalleled, and I have never met a horse like her since.

Let their presence remind you of beauty and peace in the world.

How dance reconnects you to your body

Healing through movement - part 2

Healing from sexual trauma requires not only conscious but subconscious efforts, if you want truly break out of the self-imposed prison your brain put you in to protect you.

When we experience sexual trauma, our brain dissociates. This enables us to not only “deal” with the trauma, but disconnect so we don’t fully experience the horror of what our bodies experience.

The problem is, we stay dissociated & become completely disconnected to ourselves and bodies. We don’t fully feel anything anymore…joy, sorrow, excitement, pain. You don’t know how to be truly alive as you are not fully there, in your conscious mind and body.

What helped me get to a place of being comfortable back in my body and sexuality, was movement. This can look different to each person, but for me it was dancing. In my 20s I spent most of the decade dancing away in clubs. While this was not the healthiest way to move emotions through my body, it was what worked for me at the time. I credit it as actually being a big source of healing & reacquaintance to my body, and for this I’ll never be ashamed of it.

These days I often practice hip movements like this. Grounding, isolated moves focused on the pelvic region. Why? It helps get in touch with the parts of your body you’ve ignored because they’ve been violated. It reconnects you to the discarded parts of yourself that were too painful to take notice of before. That’s where dancing comes in. With the reconnection of our bodies with movement…you can heal.

Healing is work, yes, but it doesn’t have to be terrifying, sad and serious all the time. It can be fun, exciting, new, and different. Just approach it like a curious child and think “what can I try today that I haven’t before?” Then go do it!

Other forms of movement for healing include:
- Walking
- Running
- Stretching
- Horseback riding
- Swimming
- Yoga
- Rock climbing
- Biking
- Hiking.. And more!

I want to know… what movement worked for when you were going through something? Comment below!

#mysereneearth #traumarecovery #traumainformed #mypathtohealing #childrenofgod #traumahealing #childrenofgodcult #marydear #dancetherapy #danceitout #dancevibes #movetoheal

Healing through movement

A huge part of my healing process was movement. Sure you can talk to a therapist and cry and grieve but in order to fully heal, to fully move past trauma, you need to release the old, stuck energy in your body that is holding you back and making you sick.

And…It doesn’t have to be a sad, serious process. I wish I would have found that out sooner.

Movement in any form is important to keep the chi, our bodily life force, flowing through us freely. I often just jump and shake after an unpleasant incident just to get the negative energy out of me. We are physical beings and we need to physically shake that shit off!

Also…It keeps you looking and feeling young 🧚‍♀️🙌✨

So…let’s get physical!!

#mysereneearth #traumarecovery #traumainformed #mypathtohealing #childrenofgod #thechildrenofgod #childrenofgodcult #thefamilyinternational #marydear #dancetherapy #releasestuckenergy #lifeforce

Here's what helped me heal from trauma

Healing from traumatic events comes in many forms. First you acknowledge that you need to heal, then you begin the process. The good news is that it's not all sorrow and pain and grief. While that is a huge part, what comes after is the joy of beginning again, experiencing life with new meaning, learning who you really are, what you love and what lights you up. This is what this video is all about.

2019 and 2020 were two of the hardest yet most transformative of my life. It helped me create the life I have today, a life I truly I love. 💛💜

#traumarecovery #mysereneearth #freedom #traumahealing #traumainformed #peacebeginswithme #justbreatheletitgo