Letting go to go beyond

“To go beyond where we are now, we must let go of what we have been.” Linda Howe

When I first read that quote above, I had to sit with it for a bit.

If I want to get beyond where I am, I must let go of who I’ve been.

That hit deep. Because we tend to attach so much identity to our past, who we are, where we’ve been, our experiences and the beliefs we formed through those experiences.

To truly go beyond, we have to be willing to give all that up. Start with a clean slate, let go of what’s holding us back to welcome in what will propel us forward.

For me, I had to look at what I was still holding onto that holds me back. We all do this. Attach identities and stories to past experiences, which shapes who we are today. To go beyond that, to grow and evolve, we have to release those old stories and patterns that keep us stuck.

This is tremendously hard to do as it means I have to take ownership of my life and be accountable for all my actions and habits. It’s hard and daunting, but also well worth it when you look back and realize how far you've come.

And many times, you wouldn’t have come that far if you hadn’t given up something to get there.

Try it and see how it works for you.

What it means to "let go"

Throughout my life I’ve seen a lot of words, quotes, coaches, etc, talk about the importance of "letting go". I even started talking about it before I fully grasped the concept.

But saying "letting go" can be triggering, particularly for trauma survivors. When you say “let go”, you're telling them to let go of everything they worked to get HOLD OF in their recovery.

Letting go is also hard if you've grown up with a strict religion and the idea of a scary god. Or if you've put your trust in others (like those in power) & it backfired. The term becomes meaningless or even harmful.

So what is letting go, really?

Letting go is trusting you are supported by something greater than yourself. That you will find the courage to act at the right time, but not attached to any specific outcome. It does not mean letting go of life. It simply means you trust you are protected and guided, enough to put one foot in front of the other. A day at a time. This is how we live in peace & flow, connected to ourselves and intuition.

But how do you safely let go? In my 39 years of life, I've never heard a clear explanation until I came across Linda Howe, who provides a simple method.

Linda says the safest way of letting go is to put your trust in something dependable first. This could be anything from the cycles of the moon, plants that grow, planets in orbit, the sunrise, your vital organs working. Something tangible & reliable.

It has nothing to do with spirituality, it just has to be meaningful to you. What is that? Waves crashing on a beach? Birds flying in the sky? Literally anything that is a constant in your life, and there are many. You can let go into something you trust.

When you find that constant, relax into the idea there is a power for good at work in your life, and you can trust it without a second thought. Learn to trust what you can see, before trusting what you can't see. This is the safest way for your nervous system to begin to relax. Then, you can start to let go. Eventually, you won't have to keep letting go, because you’ll always be in flow, and at peace.

Then, you can start all that other spiritual stuff. Try it, and see how it works for you.

How I keep sabotaging myself...and how to stop it

"Excuses for ourselves still ultimately be the killer of our dreams." -- @realcandaceowens

Recently I realized I've been making a lot of excuses for myself. Why I haven't gotten to X point in life or accomplished X goal. Then I suddenly realized that the only person holding me back is myself.

I realized that the biggest thing I was doing was making excuses for myself. “It’s not the right time, I don’t feel like it, I don’t feel ready, etc.” But as the famous quote says, “Done is better the perfect,” It’s so important to actually START something and get it going, get it finished, even if it’s not perfect, stop making the excuses that are holding you back and step into the unknown.

So I decided to stop the self sabotaging behavior, take a few steps back and reassess some patterns in my life. While yes, I will be letting go of some things and grieving the way I thought my life would go, that only means I'm making room for better things to come.

That also means I’ll be challenging myself a lot more, stepping into more discomfort and allowing myself to grow, to reach new goals and to set standards that I have been too overwhelmed to set or felt like they were too much out of reach. Even if I felt that it's too much pressure or I’m not prepared, I have to remember that Tomorrow never really comes, and preparation can sometimes be a sneaky disguise for procrastination.

To turn our aspirations into reality, we must be willing to step into the unknown, face our fears head-on, and push ourselves beyond what feels safe and familiar. That's where the magic happens!

So, here's my challenge to myself: To on a journey of discomfort and growth, with the unwavering determination to reach my goals. Whether it's pursuing a new career path, starting a passion project, or simply taking better care of ourselves, l will banish procrastination from my life.

Progress doesn't always come easily. It's okay to stumble, make mistakes, and encounter setbacks along the way. Embrace those moments as opportunities for learning and growth. Each step, no matter how small, brings us closer to the person we aspire to be.

From now on I will hold myself accountable, cheer others on, and celebrate every milestone achieved. I will share struggles and triumphs, and inspire others to join this incredible journey. We're capable of more than we could ever imagine, and it all starts with that courageous first step.

So, here's to embracing discomfort, bidding farewell to procrastination, and unleashing our full potential! It’s time to step into our greatness and stop sabotaging myself and my dreams.

What have you been putting off lately and finding excuses for? Take a look at your life, you may be surprised at what you find.

How to find the beauty in taking risks

The amount of people that still think I'm traveling with a dude, or someone that is secretly taking my photos, or that I'm only in places where I have friends/know others is hilarious.

Sure, there are times I'm unsure of where to stay. I have to be careful as a solo female traveler, but it doesn't deter me from getting out and exploring the world.

Last year when I heard about the murder of Gabi Petito on SM, I was camped in the desert in the above photo. The thought crossed my mind that maybe I should move. Maybe I wasn’t safe. Maybe there was a serial killer in this desert. Ridiculous thoughts I would've never considered had I not known about it the murder beforehand.

Then I remembered that this girl’s situation had nothing to do with mine. her story is not mine, her life is not mine, her circumstances are not mine. So why was I afraid? I chose in that moment to stay in the spot I was, and I would have missed the incredible sights and adventures the next day if I chickened out and left to a "safer" spot.

We've been so programmed as females in society to stay in one place, not explore or go out on our own. That everything is dangerous and out to kill us. That we're not safe without a man.

Sure, there are risks. But we risk our lives everyday driving in our car to go to the store. If I had listened to everyone who told me to stay home the past 2 years, I would still be in the same Austin apartment I lived in for ten years. I would've never gone to Asia, driven across the U.S, stayed in cabins in remote areas & seen friends around the country.

Even now as I prepare for my next trip, people are asking if I know anyone there or if I'm going to see someone. No, I don't know anyone in that country, and most of the time I don’t speak the language of that country either. I just go and learn on the fly. that’s the beauty of traveling. That’s the beauty of freedom and the beauty of taking risks.

Stop letting all the fear mongering on the news affect you. Stop letting other's fears affect you. Turn off the TV. For real. Just stop watching the news. You will see how little it really affects you when you step away from the brainwashing and just live your life. Yes, there will always be others suffering. But how do you expect to help them when you won't even help yourself? Put yourself first. There is no shame in it.

Then get outside and go do something you've always wanted to but have been too scared to. 💚💜💙

It's ok to be wrong sometimes

Learning to accept when you’re wrong…and that your views can change over time

I had an interesting experience recently. A super woke channel accidentally promoted a video made by the cult I grew up in, The Children of God. This video was promoted in positive way, giving credit to its apocalyptic theme as “foretelling” of things to come.

When my comment on the video went unanswered, I sent a DM explaining that this video was made by an abusive cult that trafficked children. All children in the video were underage, filmed at a massive compound in Japan with 300 members. I know cause I was there.

Thankfully, I did get a response and they agreed to take the video down, but adding after that they “didn’t like how I communicated the info” to them. Well, I wouldn’t like it either if someone told me the video I posted to push my agenda came from an abusive cult. I’d be pretty embarrassed, actually.

But this experience did give me something to ponder. No matter how woke we are, no matter how much we know about gender, race, the pineal gland, ascension, or politics, we always have something new to learn. We’ll still be wrong about things, or believe information from sources we did not thoroughly research or know where it came from.

And you know what, that’s ok. That’s life. It’s OK to be wrong. It’s OK to change your beliefs. It’s OK to believe something 100%, then realize it was wrong. It’s OK to be checked by others and to learn from them. Yes, realizing your beliefs may not have been the right ones does sting. I’ve swallowed some big truth pills recently when I realized what I’ve been conditioned to believe my entire life was completely wrong. But accepting it, learning from it, & moving on is what matters most.

I’m grateful for this experience that reminded me to listen to other viewpoints, as hard as it may be. I don’t have all the answers, nobody does. But if someone has taught me something, I always try to acknowledge that, and allow myself the grace to change my opinion, change my belief, and understand that I’m a dynamic human being that is constantly changing and evolving.

We are ever changing humans that are here to grow, learn, and experience everything that life has to offer. Rather than shut out differing opinions, we should try our best to listen, as hard as it may be. Reaching a hand across the table to hear a differing point of view is essential to critical thinking and logic. Embrace the differences, take what is meaningful to you and leave the rest out. You never know what you may learn or where it will take you.

Don't let others get in the way of your plans

Reminiscing on my accidental 8 hour hike in the Idaho mountains in nothing but a bikini and shorts

Recently I was thinking back on a time in 2021 that I accidentally went on an 8 hour round trip hike specifically to swim in a glacier lake at the top of the Sawtooth Mountains.

This hike itself was not an accident, I fully intended to go. It was however, totally last minute and I climbed the 4 hours up in nothing but my tennis shoes, a bikini and a water bottle. Needless to say, I passed many a concerned hiker with all their gear, telling me it's a 4 hour trek up and 4 hours back down and I wasn't dressed appropriately, lol. But I was not deterred.

Sometimes the best experiences are the ones least planned. I was lounging in a hot spring thinking how I'm totally gonna regret this visit to Idaho if I didn't go find and swim in that lake. So I picked up and left.

While yes, hiking one way for 4 hours was not my plan (I initially thought it was a 4 hour TOTAL hike, not 4 hours one way) and I probably would have prepared more, turns out it really wasn’t necessary. The water bottle I had was enough. It was September in Idaho so not hot at all.

Turns out this became one of my favorite days in Idaho. Not only because of the insane beauty 10,000 feet up, but because of the random people I met along the way (many kind and concerned souls, and also another lone hiker on the way down!) and the incredible sights I saw.

I was literally the only person there. There were two lakes, and everyone was headed to the bigger, grandiose one. which means the small lake was completely empty and literally the most peaceful place I had been to on my trip. Not to mention the glacier water was crystal clear, as you could see the ice from the mountaintops melting in the water below. So I was able to get fresh, pure, glacier water to fill up my depleted water bottle.

People always tell you you can’t do things. They’ll say it’s too dangerous or it’s too risky. "You don't have the right shoes, what about a bear, you'll run out of water, you have a small dog, you'll get ticks," blah blah blah. I don’t listen to them. If I want to do something and it feels good to me, I do it. And those experiences always end up being the best ones.

Do not let other people’s fear deter you from doing what you want. If I had let anyone’s fear of my solo trip around the USA affect me, I would have never left! Instead, it became one of the most incredible 6 months of my life. Thank others for their concern, then move with your life.

See below for more pictures of my solo hike and to see photos of me in my hiking gear 😂